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City Leaders Ask For More Free Bedtime Geese Stories
Locals are wondering about the geese and why they’ve chosen to take up residency in our
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Locals Reminisce of Burnt Building That Has Sat Vacant Since 1978
Downtown Rockford’s poor, old, brick Building (which sat predominantly vacant since 1978) has caused locals to
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Expired Pasta Sauce Melts Furniture Beams at Downtown’s Huge West Side Ristorante
Provolone Ferne Ristorante Cucina Kök’s west side grand opening has been cancelled due to the horrific
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Rockford Asks, “Why Don’t We Get a Fancy Pipeline?”
The controversial construction of the Dakota Access Pipeline is a call to action for many environmentally
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Facebook Prayers Saved Grandma’s Life
Rockford- Betsy Stienbecker was dead. She flat-lined Saturday night surrounded by her loving family. Grandma Stienbecker
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8 Dead, 15 Injured After Local Musician Discovers New McDonalds Sandwich
“I warned Him. I told him,‘You don’t know how the internet will react if you post
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Friday Funday Lunch Discussion: Do Nurses Have God Complexes?
Do Nurses Have God Complexes? “Yes. They do.” Says the Holy Ghost.
Rockford, IL – Nurses can be beautiful and handsome, but most often their sexiness and charm is overshadowed by the power of our Lord, Jesus Christ and his father, God. We talked to their friend, Holy Ghost, for the answer to this weekend’s national discussion: Do Nurses Have God Complexes?
“Yes, they do. I’ve tried to bring this topic up a few times with God and His Son, but we never get too far because we’re three in one, or something like that. Most nurses I’ve provided oversight on to report back to the team here have expressed the abilities to know everything – more than their bosses, the doctors. Some nurses have acted upon possesing God’s complex by offereing all-knowing answers in public forums such as Facebook and Pinterest. This is a concern for myself, but God seems to be occupied with other issues regarding the human race. Some nurses DO NOT understand that eating as much fast food as they do is an offense to God. Jesus doesn’t seem to care these days. I’m hoping to get to the bottom of this, but like I said, this three in one Holy Trinity thing is quite a hurdle to get over.”
There ya have it, straight from the Holy Ghost’s mouth.
Alonzo Bottoms
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