Machesney Park Guy Wakes Up To New Tune After Power Outage

20 Jan, 2013

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Loves Park, IL – Machesney Park went dark and cold late Saturday night as ComEd suffered a major power outage. Some locals suffered more than others come Sunday morning.  Ronnie Jethrows had been waking up to the same tune on his alarm clock for twenty eight years until Sunday, January 20th, 2013.

“I’s could sings yous all the words frontwards and backwards to Foreigner’s “Feels Like The First Time”.  It’s my favorite song and it’s kept me going strong for almost three decades until the power went out Saturday night in Machesneys Parks.  Yous can imagine my disgusts when I wokes up today to the tune of “Shiny Happy People” by that terrible 1980s dance band, R.E.M.s.”

Jethrows told RKFDNews.com that his alarm clock model was equipped with three triple AAA and three 9V backup batteries but he didn’t know that “they were dead“.

“I swears to God that I changed them out last summer thinking ComEd was going to fail my neighborhood.  Everybody be running they air conditioners at the same time so I sure as hail prepare for power outages.  Lou Gramm’s voice has helped me awake every morning for twenty eight years.  This is pretty big news for Ronnie Orenthal Jethrows.  Today, I wokes up late which means tomorrow will be worser.  I haven’t been late to work in 28 years.  Coincidental  I don’t thinks sos… but maybe this is a sign to listen to some new musics. Hail, whys nots?”

Ronnie called his employer, Woodward Governor, to let them know he might be late to work in the morning this week until he gets used to his new alarm clock setting.

– George Brawn