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SupplyCorn Stuns City With Name Change to SupplyPorn

Rockford, IL – What a twisted, unpredictable 24 hours it has been for the City of Rockford, it’s hopeful leaders and depressed civilians. We broke news about Newton, Iowa’s, largest manufacturer, SupplyCorn, moving it’s business to downtown Rockford.  We asked

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Where’s Rick? There’s Larry! #2

Rick Nielsen Sighting provided by Kraig Nichols, Rockford, IL: “Spotted Rick this morning at the Stop-N-Go on North Main Street.  It looked like he had a bottle of YooHoo in his hands.  I waited behind him in line for quite

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City Hires 150 Invisible Road Construction Workers

ROCKFORD , IL – In an attempt to combat the increasing number of road construction sites, the city of Rockford has appointed 150 invisible laborers to work around the clock. “They may not cast a shadow, but they sure as hell put in

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Cheddar Addiction Proves Delicious

Rockford, IL – Chad Muckgrunt, 27, a Wisconsin native, always considered himself a connoisseur of fine cheese in all it’s forms. He admired the texture of mozzarella, the complexity of havarti, and the punch of monterey jack; but, one day

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State’s Attorney Says No To Squirt Guns, Yes To Vowels

Rockford, IL- State’s Attorney, Joe Bruscato, disappointed the Winnebago County Board and many local Caucasians last night by telling them that he does not support Conceal Carry of Squirt Guns. The room appeared disgruntled and quite pasty with his opinions.

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