Mr. Lothario Makes a Rockford Pizza For Mr. Strumwell

Mr. Lothario Makes a Rockford Pizza For Mr. Strumwell

papa_murphys_jack-o-lantern_pizza

Rockford, IL – James Lothario took the day off to make a Rockford Pizza according to his neighbor, Joseph Dontel Strumwell.  Strumwell came home for lunch to find Mr. Lothario in his kitchen using his family’s wood-brick oven.  The two men laughed after Lothario explained that Jillian Strumwell had let the neighbor in to cook the Rockford pizza in exchange for feeding Mr. Strumwell for lunch as a surprise.

“I enjoy making the Rockford pizza.  When Jillian told me that they had a wood-brick oven, I offered to feed her family in exchange for using their wood-brick oven to cook the special Rockford pizza,” said James.  Besides pepperoni, green peppers, pineapple and sausage, Lothario “added a little something-something to the sauce if you knows what I means!”

We don’t know what he means, and neither did Mr. Strumwell when he discovered Mr. Lothario naked in his own kitchen making a Rockford pizza. Strumwell was caught off guard by his nude neighbor in his kitchen but told RKFDnews.com, “At first I was like, ‘you be f*cking my wife on Tuesdays at noon, too?’ But then I was like, damn, that Rockford pizza smell good bro.”

But was it a good Rockford pizza? We have the answer:

“Mr. Lothario make a nice Rockford pizza. It was very delicious, yes,” concluded Mr. Strumwell.

You will learn more when we know less.™

– Ron Kites



Related Articles

Mustaches are stupid…..

ROCKFORD– Dear anyone (and everyone) who has ever considered cutting a mustache out of felt and putting it on, well,

Rock River Certified Gluten Free

ROCKFORD, IL – Bill Andrews had a vision for the Rock River. While most didn’t see the big deal, Andrews

Johnny Emerald the IIIrd Releases New Song “No Jobs In Rockford Anymore”

Rockford, IL –Johnny Emerald the IIIrd is a self taught song writer, poet, and musician from Rockford, IL who also happens

No comments

Write a comment
No Comments Yet! You can be first to comment this post!

Write a Comment

Thank you for spending time with us on the internet. Please waste more time and energy by sharing your internet emotions below:

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.