Goldfish Finally Realizes He Can Go Nowhere In Life

ROCKFORD, IL – A goldfish realized that he can go nowhere and he will die in a small see-thru glass home in Rockford of Illinois in a special bullet-proof aquarium called your mind. More on this incredible heart breaking story and many more exciting stories when we get drunk enough to care about providing you the noose for free. (Please, don’t hate the player, hate the Gatorade and the NIKE endorsements.)
Jay Vannigan
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