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Rockford’s #1 Mexican Restaurant Delivers Sad News
Rockford, IL – Rockford’s favorite Mexican restaurant(s), Taco Bell, is leaving the region. Taco Bell’s North American CEO, Steven “Nevets” Gomez, released a statement confirming the sad news:
Look, it’s a logo! A free ad placement for Taco Bell!
“We keep on winning the Rockford Register Star’s Best of Rockford readers poll award for being your city’s Favorite Mexican Restaurant, but we can’t afford to serve tacos to the community anymore. Many reasons led to this decision, but the most important one regards the lack of soap being used by its locals. Rockford, you have to use soap with warm water. Do it, and Taco Bell will return.
Free soap for Rockfordians
We have to try harder, people. Be the solution, not the problem. In this case, it’s simple: Use soap, save Taco Bell.
You will learn more when we know less.™
– JoAnne Rankles
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$10 Black Metal Rockford Tee
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