Th’ Olympic Tavahn (Redneck Translation)

“The Olympic Tavern,” originally published by Kate Menstraight. Translation of original article translated by Johnny Redneck of Rockford, IL, below. Ah was axed last week whether ah was aware of some uneasiness which, it was said, existed in Rockfo’d on

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Report: City Leaders Launch Online Campaign To Increase Offline Sexy Time

Rockford, IL – Online positivity has been heavily trending throughout Rockford’s business and city government sectors since 2012 to increase the community’s emotional tweets, posts, videos and internettting stuff on social media.  The city wide effort for celebrating the city’s

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Famous Rockford Mommy Makes Cookies For Child’s Classroom

Rockford, IL – Famous Rockford mommy blogger and self-taught graphic designer, Shelly, released a public service announcement on her website today that she made cookies for her daughter’s class to help Transform Rockford.   Shelly is currently separated from her famous

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Rockford Daylight Hours Goes Into Effect Tonight

Rockford, IL – This is a public service reminder from RKFDnews.com to the residents of Winnebago County to set back their clocks one hour tonight at midnight.  City officials declared March 26th as the official day for the citizens of Rockford,

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REAL NOOSE: Transform Rockford is Not a Grassroots Non-Profit Organization

In the better interest of the community, we’ve decided to occasionally release real news tips we receive leads on for looking into further.  “Transform Rockford” is today’s topic.   On January 16th, 2014, of this year, President Obama revealed 7

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Weatherman Warns Rockford Residents of Warmer Weather Crime

Rockford, IL – Local weatherman, Paul Thormstrum, had a few words of advice for residents awaiting the warmth of the sun after a brutal winter. “With warmer weather in Rockford region comes more crime. Lock your f*cking doors.  It’s as

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