Posts From Chaz "Jet Lag" Stalmach
Back to homepageHappy Ending for Kryptonite Bar Owner Chris Wachowafcheski
Rest easy friends. I know how worried you were when you heard Kryptonite was closing. You’ve probably heard the rumors that Rockford Art Deli was planning to buy the bar and turn it into an all age venue. We’re relieved
Read MoreArea Lives Improved by Local Organic Geo-Neutral Free Range Heroin
A great new option for the many health conscious heroin addicts in the Rockford area has just hit the streets. Users can now buy unfilter, GMO free, gender neutral Heroin grown from Rockton’s sustainable poppy plant population and hand crafted
Read More16 Things You Never Knew About the Rock River
Sure, you know about dead bodies and the Waterfront Festival. You’re a smart Rockordian with some college experience and a firm grip of Wikipedia. You drink fancy beers at that stimulus package brew house and eat pizza at the City
Read MoreLocal Musician is Patient Zero of a New Less Appealing Form of Ebola
Coughing? Sneezing? You probably have Luttrell Ebola. Local scientists have traced the virus back to a singer/song-writer by the name of Derek Luttrell. LE (Luttrell Ebola) hasn’t yet claimed any lives, but it has cost out local economy hundreds of
Read MoreRockford DMV Locations Will Close in Observance of April Fool’s Day
That’s right folks! Rockford area Department of Motor Vehicles locations will be closed April Fool’s Day, Friday April 13th. This is the first time April Fool’s has fallen on Friday the 13th in 37 years! I know, It seems like
Read MoreRussian Sleeper Agent Accidentally Activated at CNVR Poetry Night
Rockford, IL – CNVR doesn’t seem like the kind of venue you would find a deep-cover KGB operative. This small dimly-lit art place thing is supposed to be an incubator for creativity, not espionage. However, questions can and should be
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