RKFDnews.com Archive — Real, Original, Excellent Stories For Mediocre People
Back to homepage2014 State of the City Address – Rockford, IL
Rockford, IL – Mayor Barry Morrison hosted his 9th annual State of the City Address at the Coronado Theater in Rockford, IL last night. If you missed it, below is the transcript. To read the Redneck translation, click here. To
Read MoreCity of Rockford Designates Wednesdays as Baby Heather Day!
Rockford, IL – The City of Rockford quickly honored the historic event that occurred at Jay and Gordon Fernandezes’ household last night when their daughter, Baby Heather, mutter her first word, “Rockford.” (Click Here To Read) Mayor Barry Morrison’s office released
Read MoreReport: Rockford Baby’s First Word Shatters Centuries of Infant Behavior Skills
Rockford, IL – Centuries of infant behavior patterns came to a standstill in Rockford, IL last night for the proud parents of an 18 month old daughter. Jay and Gordon Fernandez were playing with their baby Heather when she muttered
Read MoreWatham Tap (Elmer Fudd Translation)
“The Latham Tap,” originally published by Kate Menstraight. Translation of original article by Elmer Fudd, exclusive to RKFDnews.com. Kate’s Compwaint Cownew Wettews of honest compwaints fwom an honest Kate. Dewe awe owganizations I twuwy despise. Dey wack mowaws, chawactew, and honesty. Dey
Read MoreWORLD PREMIER: Cory Chisel and Lord Thomas Derby Perform “Honest Man Blues” Together
Rockford, IL – RKFDnews.com is proud to present the world rerelease of Cory Chisel and The Wandering Sons‘ hit song, Honest Man Blues, performed with Lord Thomas Derby, the CEO and LORD of ALL in the YOU$A at Derby | Reynolds–THE
Read MoreTh’ Olympic Tavahn (Redneck Translation)
“The Olympic Tavern,” originally published by Kate Menstraight. Translation of original article translated by Johnny Redneck of Rockford, IL, below. Ah was axed last week whether ah was aware of some uneasiness which, it was said, existed in Rockfo’d on
Read More
