Poork Town: Rockfordians Petition to Make KFC Original Recipe the State Bird

Poork Town:  Rockfordians Petition to Make KFC Original Recipe the State Bird

 

kfc-1

[hr]

Poork Town is a special series from RKFDnews.com that focuses on what makes our community’s egos, stomachs, necks, legs, arms, butts and heads so large, poor, and proud.

[hr]

Rockford, IL – While many congressmen in Illinois return to their constitutes to handle pressing topical matters in politics, it seems that no one is above the influence of the fast food marketing industry. “I don’t care if it has ‘Kentucky’ in the name,” stated petitioner Carl Belway, “It’s delicious. Are you going to tell me that Illinois isn’t delicious? It just makes sense.” Last week, Mr. Belway and 45 other proud fast food goers met up in Congressmen Todd Nunzulo’s office to state their case.

“At first I couldn’t believe what I was hearing,” stated the congressmen. “But they brought in a couple buckets of the stuff and it was dynamite.” The petitioners have hit a roadblock however, as chicken isn’t necessarily considered a veritable bird by opinion of the masses. One opposed to the change in state bird is school teacher Anna Jergensen, who created her own petition which would limit the usage of the word “bird” to “animals who have wings, that can fly for distances greater than a mile.”

“What they’re talking about is semantics, we’re talking about herbs and spices,” Belway quipped. “If you can deep fry a Cardinal and make it taste this wonderful, then by all means let’s not only keep it as the state bird, but add it to the value menu.” Congressmen Nunzulo wouldn’t comment on any future decisions, but did admit that it would probably take a bipartisan committee to decide the outcome, and was prepared to follow up on legislation as long as he was able to take a couple of buckets with him down to Springfield.

– Gilbert Grebner


Tags assigned to this article:
fat townkfc chickenrockford

Related Articles

Rockford Leaders Call Angelina Jolie For Help

Rockford, IL – Word from City Hall has the village of Rockford, IL celebrating great news tonight.  Local leaders including

Dear Kardashians: Please Build a Jason’s Deli on North Main Street

A new noose breaking advice column presented by rkfdnews.com’s staff reporters to address the city of Rockford’s personal needs, romantic

9 Schools and 2 Grocery Stores Closing Replaced by 3 Fast Food Restaurant Dreams

Rockford, IL – The community of Rockford in Illinois has rallied behind terrible (but funny) recent news this month that

No comments

Write a comment
No Comments Yet! You can be first to comment this post!

Write a Comment

Thank you for spending time with us on the internet. Please waste more time and energy by sharing your internet emotions below:

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.