Local Man Stabs Duck
Rockford IL– A Mallard duck was punched in the beak and stabbed in the back by a naked masked intruder, police said.
Witnesses told police just before 2:30 p.m. Friday, that a naked man– in what appeared to be Mexican wrestling mask– was attacking a duck near the river behind the Why M.C. Hayyy building. Witnesses said the intruder punched him in the beak and stabbed him in the back wing with a tiny blue knife while yelling, “Neil, why? Why?! Answer Me! D__n you, Neil!” before running from the scene and driving away in a red station wagon.
The duck was taken to an area animal hospital, where he was treated and released. The duck’s name is not Neil but witnesses believe the intruder had mistaken the Mallard for their friend, Neil.
Police said they do not have any suspects.
Related Articles
8 Dead, 15 Injured After Local Musician Discovers New McDonalds Sandwich
“I warned Him. I told him,‘You don’t know how the internet will react if you post that picture. People could
RKFDP Officers and Fox Standoff Ends In Sticky Situation
Rockford, IL – A very sticky situation went down in Rockford last night. A Fox defending himself with his gluegun was
Man Woman or Beast Robs Gas Station
ROCKFORD-(RKFDP) are seeking help to locate a man or woman or beast who robbed a Rockford gas station of its dignity
THESIS SOUL SOD : ( POUR LITTLE DOCKY