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Facebook, Helping Grandma Stay Racist

Facebook, Helping Grandma Stay Racist

The past ten years of social media advances have done a lot for Bigots, Racists and Geese. They’re no longer alone and afraid to honk, or afraid to marginalize an entire group of people, based on their race, gender identity and social/economic status. They’ve found their flock and they’re flying in a hashtag-able V formation.

For example: Wednesday Morning, after her water aerobics class, Old Lady Davidson and her friend Gerty went to Denny’s Restaurant for the Early Goose Special. Their food was fine. Their service was adequate, but there sure were a lot of Mexicans there. “Illegals, no doubt about it.as Gerty put it. They were both very concerned. Back in the day, Gerty would have to call Sheryl to tell her how dangerous Denny’s has become. Old Lady Davdison would have to call Darlene, but what about Betsy? Betsy was hard of hearing and rarely answered the phone anymore, but she really cares about the chain restaurants in Rockford- Good job Betsy!  She may not have heard about the gang bangers at Denny’s until it was too late.

Today, it’s much easier. Gerty and Old Lady Davidson only have to share their unfounded concern with Facebook. If they’re lucky, word will get back to Denny’s and those Mexican criminals will migrate south for a permanent winter.

Facebook also provides an outlet to anyone or anything who wants to “report the noose.” Unlike the younger generation, who like and share somewhat reputable online noose sources, such as RKFD News and Whoopty Do Rockford, Grandma Likes Rockford Community News, a pro-lynching, racist noose page, that never reports on geese related issues. It is ran by a group of angry water fowl, who only eat food scraps from east side restaurants, like RBI and Greenfire. Noose sources like Rockford Community News are fulfilling a demand for angry, reactionary dribble, that the Bettys and Betsys of the world eat up, like bread crumbs on the bike path.

Looks like Grandma has finally found a space for herself and her racist friends. Unfortunately, it’s not Myspace, it’s our space. We have to #share our social media with racist geese and Grandmas around the world, but we don’t have to #like it. Some Rockfordians won’t have it. Kids like Cooper Ashlock and other Internet stars have had enough goose crap. They’re part of a movement called #BlockYouGrandma. The name says it all. Whether your Grandma is a bigot or not, Ashlock would have you block her. The goal is to shun Grandmas away from the internet and back to the knitting needles.

We, here at RKFD news are with Ashlock. Grandma is a bad goose egg! Don’t let her hatch on your social media.


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  1. Abel Diaz 4 November, 2016, 16:55

    By any chance do you guys prefer Taco Bell over RBI’s? Because I certainly do

    Reply this comment

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