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Career Tips on Becoming A Rockford Area News Reporter, Anchor, Actor, Senator

Rockford, IL – Our unpaid and over-educated staff has put together a list of tips to help fellow journalists transform their careers into something comparable to a Rockford area news personality; which can earn you a quicker ticket out of town to Oklahoma, Dubuque, Springfield, Beloit, Chicago and Hollywood.
1. Become an aspiring model or athlete.
2. Stop reading novels, start flipping through People, US, Rockford Register Star, Rock River Times and Teen magazine on a daily basis for news tips.
3. Purchase an annual tanning subscription.
4. Hang out downtown at Carlyle or on the west side at Olympic after your shift ends with your station’s coworkers and sign autographs.
5. Show an interest in high school sports.
6. Cover city events to promote positivity and transformation or whatever.
7. Never do fact checks.
8. If you’re a woman, get a boob job.
9. WOMEN: Put in 2 years, at least, use your news reporting skills to build an acting career!
10. MEN: Put in 16 years, at least, to start your campaign to be a state senator!
11. Come back to Rockford often to say, “Hi, Rockford!”
If all else fails, be a local celebrity!
– Chet Fairway
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