Bears’ Charles Tillman Fighting Fumbling Baby Urges

Bears’ Charles Tillman Fighting Fumbling Baby Urges

Peanuts Tillman Working With Rockford School District’s Famous Psychotherapist, The Great Paul, To Cure Baby Fumbling Urges

Star Defense Person Causes Fumbles On The Field, But Can He Stop Urges To Make Wife Fumble New Baby? Our new sports reporter, Pancake Johnson, has some answers.

Charles Tillman, Chicano Bears’ Star Defense Guy, Causes Fumbles On The Field, But Can He Stop Urges To Make Wife Fumble New Baby?

Chicago and Rockford IL – Charles Tillman, the star cornerquarterrunningsomethingback from the Chicango Bears, is fighting new urges.  Fumbling the baby type of urges but much, much, much, much worse, sports fans.

“Something is not right.  On my way to the refrigerator today, I walked by my wife holding our newborn and I had the awful urge to want to punch the newborn baby out of my wife’s hands,” said Tillman to our Rockford school district’s famous psychotherapist, The Great Paul (Note, no relation to our all-knowing advice columnist, Paula The Great).

The Great Paul treats professional athletes on weekends to pick up a little extra cash when time allows. RPS205 keeps Paul The Great busy, but as he puts it, “Not busy enough for Charles “Peanuts” Tillman, he needs me right now,” said The Great Paul.

Upon hearing the news that his wife was with child, the Chicago Bears cornerback whose teammates call him Peanuts, or Nutz, has been fighting am irresistible desire to overhand punch his new baby daughter out of his wife’s hands every time she holds her.

Tillman said, “It goes against every thing I’ve ever been coached by Lovie. All I know is she better hold her with both hands and close to her body. In fact, she’s better to get on down to one knee when she’s breastfeeding.”

Paul The Great promises all Chicano Bears foosball facebook fans that, “Mr. Tillman will be cured before the end of the season or by his newborn’s eighteenth birthday.  I, The Great Paul, promise the entire Chicano Bears’ nation that Charles Peanuts Tillman will be cured from fighting awful urges to fumble the baby out of his beautiful wife’s hands.”

– Pancake Johnson

If any of our readers are fighting fumbling baby urges, contact us.



Related Articles

Man from Rockford reinvents the wheel..

ROCKFORD- A local man has been commissioned by Chinese officials to reinvent the popular Made in China sticker. Bob Wilson

Career Tips on Becoming A Rockford Area News Reporter, Anchor, Actor, Senator

Rockford, IL – Our unpaid and over-educated staff has put together a list of tips to help fellow journalists transform

Watham Tap (Elmer Fudd Translation)

“The Latham Tap,” originally published by Kate Menstraight. Translation of original article by Elmer Fudd, exclusive to RKFDnews.com. Kate’s Compwaint Cownew Wettews

No comments

Write a comment
No Comments Yet! You can be first to comment this post!

Write a Comment

Thank you for spending time with us on the internet. Please waste more time and energy by sharing your internet emotions below:

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.