Breaking News
Bye bye 2021 happy 2022 rockford smells still New Year: Covid Update
People with COVID-19 have had a wide range of symptoms reported – ranging from mild symptoms
...0I Used To Be A Man, Now I Am A Sea Otter
Rockford, IL – Timothy Krill was his own man for 27 years of his life. A
...0City Leaders Ask For More Free Bedtime Geese Stories
Locals are wondering about the geese and why they’ve chosen to take up residency in our
...0Locals Reminisce of Burnt Building That Has Sat Vacant Since 1978
Downtown Rockford’s poor, old, brick Building (which sat predominantly vacant since 1978) has caused locals to
...0Expired Pasta Sauce Melts Furniture Beams at Downtown’s Huge West Side Ristorante
Provolone Ferne Ristorante Cucina Kök’s west side grand opening has been cancelled due to the horrific
...0Rockford Asks, “Why Don’t We Get a Fancy Pipeline?”
The controversial construction of the Dakota Access Pipeline is a call to action for many environmentally
...0
Rockford Clock Tower Finally Demolished After Years of Telling The Wrong Time
Rockford, Illinois — A Rockford icon came tumbling down today.
The Clock Tower, located off of the East State Street / I-90 Exit, hasn’t told the right time in years despite millions of interstate drivers seeing it as their official “Welcome to Rockford” landmark while travelling east and west from Chicago to Wisconsin. Truly remarkable when you think about how many fucks the Clock Tower had to give: none.
Recent efforts to fix the clock’s time and mechanics by radio hosts, Double T and Stone IPA, along with homeless pop star, Johnny Emerald the IIIrd, didn’t matter in the end because local Rockfordians don’t give a fuck about math and telling proper time nor have any more fucks to give.
Local celebrity, Ryan Rogers, was there to capture it on video.
Listen to the hit song, “Save The Clock Tower,” by Johnny Emerald the IIIrd, written and recorded in 2014.
We’re sad to say that Rockford got what Rockford deserved once again: A pile of shit to clean up.
— Rick Nielsen
Related Articles
Cheerleader Rallies #3 Most Miserably Funny City
Rockford, IL – Rockford cheerleader Pawla Careola led her team to the World University Cheerleading Championship in Arizona recently. She
Watham Tap (Elmer Fudd Translation)
“The Latham Tap,” originally published by Kate Menstraight. Translation of original article by Elmer Fudd, exclusive to RKFDnews.com. Kate’s Compwaint Cownew Wettews
North Main & Auburn Streets Roundabout Driving Tips
Rockford, IL – Here’ s a helpful list of tips from our staff to you this holiday season to help
No comments
Write a commentWrite a Comment
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
Thank you for spending time with us on the internet. Please waste more time and energy by sharing your internet emotions below: