Rockford Robber Settles For Subway Sandwich and a Few Dollars To Transform City’s Crime

08 Feb, 2015

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Rockford, IL – A mid twenties man robbed a local Subway restaurant on 11th street a few nights ago in an effort to transform the city’s crime stats. Rockford Dream Police officials are still looking for the man and would appreciate any tips on his whereabouts and details of his sandwich– but we have the latter covered for you.  (You’re welcome!)

Many questions from scared and hungry Rockfordians arose on WREX-13TV’s Facebook page about the incident:  “What did he order?“, “What kind of bread and cheese did he pick?  Any seasonings?  Dressing?” and “How much money did he get with his sandwich?“

We have some answers for you that WREX-13TV will never tell you because our fans at rkfdnews.com’s Facebook page are hungrier for true, noose breaking details than your Facebook pages. Here is a list of details to help you understand the severity of this crime:

• The customer in question walked in, ordered his foot long and pretended to be hungry for a minute.
• Two Subway chefs prepared him a spicy Italian sub.
• It has delicious salami and pepperoni on it.
• The customer-soon to be thief–selected the Cheddar and Herbs bread.
• He did NOT want it toasted.
• He asked for pepperjack AND mozzarella.
• He chose green peppers, cucumbers, black olives, lettuce, tomato, oregano with oil and vinegar to put on his foot long.
• When the Subway Chef asked if he wanted a cookie and soda, he said, “No, give me all your money instead.”
• The customer pulled a little handgun out of his windbreaker to show how hungry he was.
• The Subway Chef and her assistant chef gave the hungry customer a total of $14.75 out of their pant pockets.
• The Subway Chef asked if the robber wanted the money out of the cash register and he said, “Keep the change.”
• The robber ran out of the store with his sandwich and $14.

A Subway rep laughingly told us, “Rockford, it’s time to eat again.  Don’t be afraid.  Come back to Subway, we make it #FRASH. #LOL”

Darby Appleby