Several Homes Burned By College Students

ROCKFORD, IL – Crowds of angry college students attacked people with pitch forks and burned several homes Sunday in Durand, IL. The protest-semi-riot began after a link of a vanilla ice cream cone was posted on The Fazebook, and the link did not work, police said.
The vanilla cone is tagged in a photo and local students went crazy when the link did not work, said local internet investigator, Raven Strongblood. The person who owns the account has been deleted and police are not naming him.
“The violence began in the Beaver Valley College parking lot early Sunday, and it spread into other areas through Sunday evening,” said The Great Paul, a famous regional school psychic.
“We’ve called in the State Police along with paratroopers and some dairy farmers who were constantly guarding the areas to ward off any further violence,” Bari said.
At least four houses were burned in Peckthetonica, and five others were damaged in Durand, police said. At least 50 houses were damaged or destroyed, they said.
Police were not able to provide information on the number of people injured in the violence. Here’s hoping photos of ice cream on the internet are contained, tagged properly, and controlled from the get-go to prevent further violent reactions in other cities.
Please email us if you see photos on Fazebook that are tagged wrong: [email protected]
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