RKFDnews.com Archive — Real, Original, Excellent Stories For Mediocre People
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Election 2016: RKFDnews Endorses Gorak, Lord of the Sixth Dimension
Rockford, IL — RKFDnews proudly endorses Gorak, Lord of the sixth dimension, for President of the United States. We believe he will help all of us with Making Rockford great for America on the Internet again. We spoke to Gorak today
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Rockford’s #1 Mexican Restaurant Delivers Sad News
Rockford, IL – Rockford’s favorite Mexican restaurant(s), Taco Bell, is leaving the region. Taco Bell’s North American CEO, Steven “Nevets” Gomez, released a statement confirming the sad news: “We keep on winning the Rockford Register Star’s Best of Rockford readers
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Many Locals Report Foul Manure Smell From Downtown Has Permeated Over The Entire City of Rockford
Rockford, IL — Here is an unbelievably true story we read on the internet yesterday that was initiated by one of our favorite local artists. Poop stinks, and oh boy, the smell of poop has permeated throughout Rockford. We here
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Community in Turmoil as Fake Facebook Profiles Destroy Rockford’s Social Media
“We all know who you are. You’re not funny and your negativity is only bringing this community down,” says Dick, head of the Forest City Internet Authentification (FCIA) task-force. “Some of the locals behind these profiles have been vouched for. I’ve
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Pokemon GO Blamed For Rockford’s Webcam Porn Industry Layoffs
[Thank you to Josh M. of Rockford, IL, for emailing us this noose-story.] Rockford, IL — Several of Rockford’s local webcam “porn star” ladies are out of work due to Pokemon GO. Mass layoffs are being reported all over Rockford and on the
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Phase 1: Make a Twitters With a Facebooks Page — Making Rockford Great For America On The Internet Again
Making Rockford Great For America On The Internet Again has many phases. Each of you is responsible for helping Google, Chinese project development investors, Gorman, Larry and the City of Rockford, and its most influential people—some (mainly the same few
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