Breaking News
Bye bye 2021 happy 2022 rockford smells still New Year: Covid Update
People with COVID-19 have had a wide range of symptoms reported – ranging from mild symptoms
...0I Used To Be A Man, Now I Am A Sea Otter
Rockford, IL – Timothy Krill was his own man for 27 years of his life. A
...0City Leaders Ask For More Free Bedtime Geese Stories
Locals are wondering about the geese and why they’ve chosen to take up residency in our
...0Locals Reminisce of Burnt Building That Has Sat Vacant Since 1978
Downtown Rockford’s poor, old, brick Building (which sat predominantly vacant since 1978) has caused locals to
...0Expired Pasta Sauce Melts Furniture Beams at Downtown’s Huge West Side Ristorante
Provolone Ferne Ristorante Cucina Kök’s west side grand opening has been cancelled due to the horrific
...0Rockford Asks, “Why Don’t We Get a Fancy Pipeline?”
The controversial construction of the Dakota Access Pipeline is a call to action for many environmentally
...0
School Board Dividing New Mega Schools According to Nationality for Rick Springfield’s Efficiency
Rockford, IL – RPS205309 (the Rockford Public School District) representatives have been trying to explain to the community that the recent announcement of 9 schools being closed in the next year will be better for efficiency stuff and things, stats, or whatever.
Louis Debbs, head of something financially vague with the school board said, “School Board to Demolish Neighborhood Schools, Divide New Mega Schools According to Nationality for Rick Springfield’s Efficiency.” RKFDnews asked Dobbs what he meant, “You know, help the Rockford feel better. Rick has nice hair. All of Rockford should have nice hair.“
In related local news, Rick Springfield–the 1980s heartthrob / soap star / and pop singer–told RKFDnews that he consistently has to explain to fans from the Rockford region that Tommy Tutone wrote the hit song “867-5309 / Jenny.” Springfield added, “WTF? I don’t know “Jenny,” but I knew “Jessie’s Girl” quite well. I’ve known a few Rockford mommies, too. Sing with me, baby.”
Dr. Levon Schofield, the former RPS205309 school board director is laughing at her former employer, the city, and community from afar. True story!
You and Jay and PR Etc. and KMK Media will learn more when we know less or whatever.™
– Gilbert Grebner
Related Articles
Rockford’s #1 Mexican Restaurant Delivers Sad News
Rockford, IL – Rockford’s favorite Mexican restaurant(s), Taco Bell, is leaving the region. Taco Bell’s North American CEO, Steven “Nevets”
Lost Love
Lost love – m4w – 28 (Rockford) We met last December . I still dont even remember the circumstances or
Liberace and Rockford Honored – “Behind the Candelabra” Is A Wonderful and Heartwarming Movie
ROCKFORD, IL – “Some cats don’t hiss or meow anymore at the sound of gunfire in Rockford’s toughest neighborhood,” said Dontonque,
Thank you for spending time with us on the internet. Please waste more time and energy by sharing your internet emotions below: