Breaking News
Bye bye 2021 happy 2022 rockford smells still New Year: Covid Update
People with COVID-19 have had a wide range of symptoms reported – ranging from mild symptoms
...0I Used To Be A Man, Now I Am A Sea Otter
Rockford, IL – Timothy Krill was his own man for 27 years of his life. A
...0City Leaders Ask For More Free Bedtime Geese Stories
Locals are wondering about the geese and why they’ve chosen to take up residency in our
...0Locals Reminisce of Burnt Building That Has Sat Vacant Since 1978
Downtown Rockford’s poor, old, brick Building (which sat predominantly vacant since 1978) has caused locals to
...0Expired Pasta Sauce Melts Furniture Beams at Downtown’s Huge West Side Ristorante
Provolone Ferne Ristorante Cucina Kök’s west side grand opening has been cancelled due to the horrific
...0Rockford Asks, “Why Don’t We Get a Fancy Pipeline?”
The controversial construction of the Dakota Access Pipeline is a call to action for many environmentally
...0
Remembering Larry, Rockford Public Servant and Geese Migration Activist
Rockford, IL — RKFDnews and its staff would like to extend our warmest sympathies to the community of of Rockford, and to downtown Rockford’s leaders, for losing one of its greatest activists for increasing geese migration to the downtown region, Larry Moreforme.
Larry is moving on. Where? We don’t know.
(Follow the trail that leads to China and Milwaukee’s Gorman & Company, and check back with us come April of 2017. Alas, we will miss Mr. Larry’s knowledge of the geese population and how to bring them back to the downtown river front. Whoever is replacing him is sure to continue attracting the same old bird shit. Need a hint? Take note of the new local SUPER PAC formed by SupplyCore’s CEO, and watch where the support and donations end up. Same old Rockford more for me shit. Whoever has the healthiest property portfolio to protect will become mayor.)
Larry, we want to thank you for making Rockford great for America on the internet since 2001! Your service transformed downtown Rockford into a mighty brothel of geese, ponies, and proud, caffeinated youtubers. You did the best ya could to transform Rockford on Twitter, Etsy, Ebay, Facebook and Pinterest—and we admire anyone who tries to do good internet.
#VISON
Yours forever on the internet,
RKFDnews
Related Articles
Mitt Romney Promises To End Cheetos Epidemic
Rockford, IL – For those who witnessed the second presidential debate last night there were many important topics on their mind. Not only ones that we are dealing with as a nation but also ones that affect us here, in our local community. One such topic is the Flamin’ Hot Cheetos Epidemic of 2012.
Beyonce Camp Has 0 Interest With Performing In Rockford
Rockford, IL – Beyoncé’s team has reported zero interests with performing in Rockford at the annual Davis Park Festival during
Carp, Nature’s Protectors
Rockford, IL – You’ve seen it on Carpy the River Fish and other popular TV shows; carps rescuing humans from drowning
Thank you for spending time with us on the internet. Please waste more time and energy by sharing your internet emotions below: