RKFDnews.com Archive — Real, Original, Excellent Stories For Mediocre People
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Lovers Quarrel Inspires Winter Block Party
Rockford, IL – Mindy and Justin Pickleback took their love making to new levels this past weekend. What started as a yelling match in the kitchen after a few Rolling Rocks ended up in their front yard on a pile
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City Reacts to Forbes by Learning How To Read and Write, Promises Championship in 2014
Rockford, IL – Rockford, Illinois area citizens and local leaders are still reeling from this week’s 3rd place defeat to the champion Detroit and eternal top three runner up Flint, Michigan. Forbes Magazine’s annual Miserably Funny American Cities contest revealed
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Cheerleader Rallies #3 Most Miserably Funny City
Rockford, IL – Rockford cheerleader Pawla Careola led her team to the World University Cheerleading Championship in Arizona recently. She brought home two sexy trophies with her after reading something miserably funny about Rockford of Illinois that hurt her hometown’s
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1,000 Voters Sum Up Mayor’s Race
Rockford, IL – The 2013 mayoral election is on April 9th in case you didn’t know. We took an online survey last week asking the community if they knew when the election was, who was running, and why they weren’t
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The Beauty of Barry: Sweet Peas
Hi, it’s me again, Rockford. I am a very handsome man living in an ugly town. Let me share another secret for pouty lips: Sweet Peas. My girlfriends ask me all the time, “Oh my God, Barry, your lips are
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Mayor Breaks 4th Wall From Attic, But Makes Possible Movie Starring Police & Neighbors
ROCKFORD, IL — Even the mayor can have trouble getting police to arrest innocent people in his neighborhood. After months and months of call-ins with no shows from the RKFDP (Rockford Dream Police), Mayor Barry Morrisson went to his attic
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