RKFDnews.com Archive — Real, Original, Excellent Stories For Mediocre People
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War Rages On: Local Broccoli Inventors Suffer Positivity Attack
Rockford, IL – War Rages On in Rockford, IL. The battle for Auto-Zone’s parking lot on North Main Street was the scene of defeat for the Logic Squadron this past weekend. John and his wife, Rinny Roderick – local Logic
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Leon Sandcastle Confused By Big Mayan Mistake
Rockford, IL – 2012 should have meant the inevitable end of the world to all human life as we know it. Scholars, scientists, and local astrology fanatics were convinced it was the end. “But it wasn’t. That’s what’s so messed
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The Beauty of Barry: Cock Soup
Hi, it’s me again, Rockford. I am a very handsome man living in an ugly town. Let me share another secret for feeling, looking, tasting, and smelling good: Cock Soup. My girlfriends ask me all the time, “Oh my God,
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Bartender Promoted To Strudel Chef
Articles receiving overwhelming site traffic from targeted regional IPs auto-translate themselves to that region’s language. Th’ noo economah is bein’ recalculated t’noo heights in Rockfo’d, IL. No certificashun needed, a local man wakes up fum slin’in’ shots an’ gittin’ ev’ryone
Read MoreChildren attack Milk Truck. 0
ROCKFORD — Four small children linked to at least one armed robbery of an Oberweiss milk delivery driver were arrested on a charge of armed robbery and biting.Several robberies have been reported around the area all with similar stories. Three
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Local Positivity Fights Economic Logic
Rockford, IL – The war is raging on. Positivity is at an all-time high around the Forest City of Hopes, Dreams, Sounds and Visions. The battle against logic for possession of peoples’ minds has taken it’s battle to popular social media
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